EVO 9 MR detuned

EVO 9 MR detuned

Yah initally, I tuned this ride. To cook this 450 whp dish, you need a darn good engineer to rub the engine in a horizontal motion at a constant rate, as the rubbing reach some amount of consistency, you need to increase the rate of motion and also increase the pressure on the engine. rub rub rub rub... yah... then as you rub, you wanna touch the bearings, the oil caps and all other round roly-poly things stuck to the engine. You listen to the breathing of the engine, the panting of the turbo then, As you rub harder and harder, the pressure and the heat generated will give the bloody engineer some sort of inspiration, yeah... then during this climatic timing, you decide to put in those important theories and hard found knowledge on cars into play...

the result is orgasm.

Like our sticky workshop friend says, its not how many girls you fark, its how many quality fark you have. Some how this farking theory works for us... hahaha

Just because someone has tuned more evos than me doesnt warrant me a class below my grade. In the world of passion, nothing is more insulting than a comparision of one against another of an inferior rank.

Well, like the owner said, if people can do it, why can't us, well, sometimes, time is all that is required. A little more time, just a day or 2 more, and that idling of 1000 rpm can be achieve.

Well, we have evo 9 running on higher lift than his, and that idling at 1000 didnt seem to be running smoother than the 800 rpm idling? Does this mean my tuning sucks? hmm...

Well, the theory is simple. During idling, the job of the idle valve stepper motor is it regulates the amount of air 'leaking' into the chambers for explosion. His duty is to maintain the engine speed at 800 rpm constant and preventing the engine from stalling, this is the basics of fuel injection system. The rough idling is a result of the cams profile or valves overlapping and the solution is to change from high lift to normal cams or something else which i wouldnt say ... to get that stock factory idling back (<-- sams's job... not mine!). Increasing the ignition timing does help to smoothen the idling a little, but like all old birds say, this effect has lesser effect than that of the hardware itself, cb sam like to show off his hardware knowlege to people after installing this and that, he describes his job better than squeezing women's breasts. The ignition timing increase will 'float' the sine curve a little and with a more complete combustion, the amount of 'torque drop' per combustion is lesser. I seldom talk about theories in tuning, coz, there is little or no need to prove.

Well, its really simple. Like sam rubbing engine... its the engineer's brains in hardware that delivers the results, tuning is to make that hardware work as per expectation. High lift cams? All farkers know that idling will not be factory quality mah, people raise the idling because the farking car keeps stalling and moving off traffic is a pain in the arse. So, if the tuner can make it work at 800 rpm, like those ang mo kao tuner, why increase it? tio boh?

Simple right? No rocket science involved.

Anyway... I loaded the stock maps back into the evo 9 I tuned, coz, sam says so... Well, owner is going to DKZ to have it retuned. My first reaction was "CB! car runs so smooth, 3500 rpm full boost 2 bars, no hesitation, no bogs, no engine stalling, why should I detune it?"

sam-"Just listen to me... put it back for him"

"CB! mai leh... where got this kind of lan jiao dai jee one?"

sam-"Just let him go, people say other people can do it, why you cannot?"

"**slap head** okok, boss say, I do!"

After I loaded the maps back, I was feeling farked. Its never for the money... I do not for heaven sake discuss money with sam one... The feelings sucks mega... anyway... like all games, sometimes its like that one... owner then asked me if the engine's gonna blow running on the stock maps (** reaching into pocket and squeezing the left ball**)... I was like "what the fark...!"

Ok, owner has driven 1 day on my tuning... his friends have sat in it before and yes, car runs very very smoothly with full boost of 2 bars at 3500 rpm. Turbo is bigger than Green turbo. but thats history! Yah la yah la... turbo very good la... new ang moh turbo mah...

Now, we received a phone call from someone who knows the owner... kekeke... car now runs like a frog lor... kekekeke...

before you dive into the swimming pool, you bend down first then jump... you gotta show mother nature your big hairy balls and you've got the goods before you dive brudder... hahaha shiok shoik lor...hahaha

Car dive before surging forward. I like... :) muahahahaha

Eh, DIIIiiiiiiveeee... then goooo.... diiiiivveeee then goooo....

maybe some people like to poke a different type of hole lor... but, this is poking the nose liaoz brudder... hahahahaha poke the nose then poke the ears... hahahaha... tak shiok la brudder.... poke the nose leh... hahaha... quantity nose fark ... wah hahahaha !! OOhhhhh... my ears ... my ears... hahaha... pak pak pak... ooohhh....

Verdict:
Yes, Sam clapped his hands when he heard the news.... Me? hohoho.... I laughed so bad, oh, my god... truely, from the bottom of my lam pah jee, tuning is fun.

You wanna know what it was like before...--> Evo 9 MR tuned
ok... serioudly, at least he tried my tuning before... it just that probably, we're not destined to work together thats all... no hard feelings...

Me and sam now arguing how to make a frog out of the evo 9... maybe, we can side bet then try it out on some in future... muahahaha... just kidding...

have a good laugh, shrug it off your shoulder, have a nice weekend ahead... cheers!!